30......and counting

Yeah, its been a while. A lot can happen in a while. Writing syles can change, what you believe in can change, even the person youre percieved as can change...all within a while. Can I say that has happened? Perhaps, or maybe nothing has. Whatever may have changed didnt happen drastically because each day has its own individual effects. Each person you come across has their own distinct effect on you in their own manner. Whether its good or bad is entirely up to you, we all make our own destiny. I do believe there are outside inspirations all around us, but in the end, free will makes us who we are. That and our souls. Without a soul we would be beasts of the earth wandering around without purpose. So yeah Im counting, and counting slowly as well. Being 30 makes you take things at a different pace than you did before. And I hope I keep my newfound perception. Hope everyone else counts away as well........

Chimney Tops......

Entering the last full weekend before I hit 30, and Im pretty excited about it. Up until about 2 weeks ago Ive let it get the best of me. Then I realized how many people I know that have already hit the mark and seem a lot more calm, relaxed, and mature than previous encounters. Maybe things do really slow down once you let go of being super young and hit the decade that begins the definition of the person you decide to become. And I think I have an idea of the person of who I want to start out being. And by looking at the kid that turned 20 and the man I am today, Ill be a whole lot different upon my 40th. If my life was the Chimney tops in the Smoky Mountains, I think I have hit all the hills and time to do the small rock climb to reach the crest, And I think im ready. But we will see..........

To each their own.......

Entering the last full weekend before I hit 30, and Im pretty excited about it.

Rebuilding the Great Wall.......

Second post this week and gotten some sleep, Ive already on the right track! Thats what a hard long stressful week will do for you. Ive not felt this broken down and weak in such a long long time. And it feels like im sinking all alone and the only thing anyone else is doing is putting more shovels of dirt. However, I think the worst is over and Im climbing out of another battle. The only thing I can think is this has made me stronger and im on the right path for something(whatever it is). Anything worth accomplishing in life is never easy, and sometimes we all forget that. So hopefully Ive gotten my fight back and can fully recover from everything that has happened to me pyschologically and emotionally. And hopefully this helps anyone that is going through the same kind of things. May God and peace be with you.....

Oops I did it again........

I told myself I wouldnt get so far behind in writing, but looks like I fibbed to myself. Then again I told myself Id get consistent sleep and keep a workout log, slip number two. Made a goal to read more so I could learn, didnt fufill that. Whats sad is I could make an entire blog of the things I didnt do this month and whats worse is I dont have a strong excuse why I didnt. Burnout? Laziness? No drive? A bit of them all in my opinion. Letting things allow me to drift? Putting bliss ahead of what needs to be done? Yeah, sums up my month. However, it has been needed to a certain degree. I do know I cant be the person I once was and dont have a strong desire to be that guy anyways. I have things I want to get done and they are going to take sacrifice. My faith has shown me that Ive been utterly selfish and I havent really given up anything for anyone, including myself. Anyone can do what they want, but a transcendant person does what they must. A lot of times you dont want to do what you must do, but you do it because this world is more about getting only what you want. So hopefully I stay better on my writing, read more books, get consistent sleep, and be more focused on what I do decide to spend my time on. And be less like Britney.........

Coming up for air, if only for a moment.....

Well since Ive went deep into the depths of myself and dug out some stuff, I think its time to come up and just reflect on whats going on outside of my head. At the middle of the month it looked bleak as far as hitting our sales goal at work. Nobody had anything going and gym looked sad and empty. Then something happened and we got the train going back again and people are once again working on their health. If we keep our pace for 3 more days, we will have more than enough to cover what we need. Shows what hardwork, dedication, and good leadership will bring. It feels really good to be a part of something like that, and feels good seeing great results in some of our new members. Saturday or Sunday I will weigh my final thoughts on July, but im sure we all know how I'll feel about it. Anyways, Ill post back the final results as well as other awesome things thats goin on. Till I get back on here........

Cant quite put my finger on it.......

While Im self-evalutating myself, lets go ahead and tackle the things I usually refrain from, such as dating. I actually like being single when it all comes down to it. Most people arent fans, but it seems like it has served me a good purpose throughout my twenties, for the most part. Ive had my moments I wanted to try dating, and sometimes I tried to date and sometimes I didnt. While my dating history has had several frustrating moments or longer fractions of time, I dont see any reason for changing the events thats transpired. However, recent thoughts have made me wonder how much longer do I really want to go about things in this manner. I think Ive grown to the point that it could actually be fun to date someone with the possibility of it having some lasting ability. Im definitely more sure of the man that I am, and it has opened up my mind to be able to focus more on what I want in a woman. In my younger years, I was attracted to women who went against the grain, rebelled against the laws, and did things out of the ordinary. Looking back, thats been a terrible idea. Yeah, ive got hidden rebellious tendencies here and there, but they dont last long. And these experiences didnt last long or end well. I would be attracted to girls that had some glaring characteristic and that didnt go well either. Same goes for the girls that had all these deep thoughts on life or were scared of messing up the relationship themselves. All were a bad idea and seem to all stem from my inner fear of commitment or being happy with someone. Yeah, finally admitting it and fun to say Im doing it on the internet, but its better than nowhere. So we ask, what type of girl do I need to put focus on seeing where it goes. First and foremost, a woman who has good core values that she doesnt flake about in relationships. I have mine that I occasionally struggle with and it would help to be with someone at least as strong as I am with the person they want to be. Am I saying they have to be Christian values? Honestly, in earlier times I didnt really care, but those times have passed. Denomination isnt important, but seeing eye to eye on religion is a good idea in the long run. Politics, I dont care because it may actually be fun to argue about. That and I really dont pay attention till about a week before elections. Being fit and active isnt as important as being healthy. However, it would help considering I do like hiking, photography, exercise, and bike riding. Again, another point I used to not care about but times have changed. Intellegence is still a must, but that doesnt mean she has to read books to do so, there are other ways to show your wit. Family and children are important because I plan on having them at some point. Preferrably Id like to be with someone without previous children, but I wouldnt call that a dealbreaker by any means. I love children and as long as the situation with the father wasnt anything overdramatic I am open to that type of relationship as well. Well, there are other little tweaks here and there that Im still trying to sort out, and I think I will, but I dont wanna keep on ranting about it tonight. I miss sleep and maybe itll come to me in a dream or somethin. Anyways, sleep well.............